chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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