PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Randomize
