just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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