Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
