In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
