I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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