dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Randomize