I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
