Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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