oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
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