just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
COCAINE IS GR8
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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