I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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