Me. At least after what I've been through.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
