hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Randomize
