i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
