No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
