Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
