only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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