I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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