I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Randomize