Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
