He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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