She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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