i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
