We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Randomize
