Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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