I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
