so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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