Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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