I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Randomize
