i think i have herpe
just one?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize