Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
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