I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
