Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize
