Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
