I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Randomize