Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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