I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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