I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
