you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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