Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
