this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
