so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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