you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
