one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
