It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
