Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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