Sry I called you an 8
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
