Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
