just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
